Monday, February 22, 2010

Too Big for Our Breeches

As you may have heard by now, the Winter Olympics are on now here in Vancouver. As you may not have heard (it didn't get a lot of media play), some deranged meatball tried to get at U.S. Vice-President Joe Biden during the opening ceremonies, but was foiled by some crafty Mounties who questioned his (the meatball's, that is, not the Vice-President's) cereal box cut-out credentials. According to an online CTV report entitled Man Infatuated with U.S. VP Breaches 2010 Security:
The RCMP says it has not made any changes to its security protocols because of the breech.
My favorite online dictionary gives the first definition of breech as: "The lower rear portion of the human trunk; the buttocks." Hence, a breech birth. So, while the interloper in this story was clearly an ass (who the hell has an infatuation with a Vice-President?), the word to be used here, as it was in the headline, is breach.

Speaking of the Olympics and the opening ceremonies, we took the kiddies downtown last week to spend a day exposing ourselves to Olympic fever and its attendant symptoms (over-exuberant patriotism and over-priced souvenirs). On our stroll down Granville Street, I spied through a window this sign, with its criminal breach of standard spelling protocol, lying on a desk in a cluttered office beside the box office to the Vogue Theatre, which is offering big-screen coverage of major events.

And finally, speaking of the Olympics and Vancouver, allow me to recommend this amusing divertissement  that appeared in The Province last week. It's wry, witty, and wise, and well worth the time to read and pass along. And I'm not just saying that because I wrote it.